‘Queer Love’ Ep 2: Vanessa Is Starting to Crack

Netflix must have slashed the budget for this show this season because it was for queers, because all of the dates on The Ultimatum: Queer Love take place on public benches or shipping docks.

Vanessa, the show’s slutty femme villain, is on a bench date with Lexi, aka Knockers. Vanessa is talking about what a slutty slut she is and how she wants to fuck Knockers and Knockers’ ex Rae. Knockers is like “ooohhh kay cool.” In her confessional she says Vanessa makes her uncomfortable and same.

Knockers’ next date is with Mal in a noisy lobby next to another fire pit. Mal is asking things like if Knockers snores or eats too loudly. I feel like there are maybe more important things to focus on but okay.

Sam is on a date with Tiff, in some other part of this hotel restaurant, and Tiff’s talking about how when she cooks she wants her girlfriend to get the fuck out of the kitchen. I kind of love her. Their energies do not match in any way but I’m also kind of here for it.

Mildred is dating Aussie, also a kind of unlikely couple. It feels like everyone was assigned someone more so than they actually had natural chemistry. Aussie talks about finding her purpose and why she’s alive here and now and their struggles with gender identity and it’s actually super sweet.